


I Don't Love You (Winchester x sister!reader)

by writethe100



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-10
Updated: 2018-12-09
Packaged: 2019-09-15 09:48:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16930986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writethe100/pseuds/writethe100
Summary: After a hunt, Sam and Dean suggests that Y/N should leave the family for good.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> third person to POV

‘Tonight was too risky, Sam.’ Dean paced back and forth, thinking about the danger everyone was in during the hunt.

‘It’s always risky but in the end we all protect each other. That’s what siblings are for right?’ Sam tried to call him down.

'We cannot put Y/N at risk like that. Don’t you understand?’ He whisperrf as he said her name, trying to make sure she doesn’t hear them talking about her.

Sam sighed, 'Of course I understand. But it’s our job to protect her. She’s our sister, Dean.’

'It’s our job to not put her in danger.’

'We can’t avoid danger, we’re hunters.’

'Me and you are, not her.’

Sam got up from the couch, stood face to face with his brother. 'Y/N’s a Winchester. She’s born to do this just like we are.’

'What we can do is help her avoid this life style. She’s only doing it because we are.’

'Dean… what are you trying to say?’

✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤

As I woke up from a good night sleep, I noticed that I didn’t smell bacon; Sam always cooked breakfast in the morning.

Walking into the living room, I saw both Sam and Dean sitting on the couch.

'Dean, you’re up early.’ I chuckled as I sat across from them.

'We need to talk.’ He replied in a stern tone.

'What did I do?’

He looked up, he gave a serious glare. 'What did you do? You’re always doing the wrong things when we’re hunting.’

'I actually thought I did well last night.’

'Yeah, doing great on almost getting us killed.’

I’ve never seen Dean this upset about hunting, or anything at all. Usually his response was “Do better next time kiddo” or “Listen to my instructions before you do something stupid” but this was out of line.

'Dean, is this about something else? Look, whatever I did I’m sorry. I didn’t know you would be this angry at me.’

'It’s about everything. Your lack of skills in hunting, you always fooling around with us. I’m tired of babysitting you.’

I look over at Sam, he was quiet. I was scared of what was happening. Do my brothers hate me now? 'Sammy, are you going to defend me?’

He shrugged in response. 'I’m sorry.’

Dean’s words hurt like a dagger but crying would only make everything worse. He didn’t want that kid that’s always following them like a little puppy. They wanted a sister that was an adult that can take care of herself. I thought I was, but I wasn’t enough for them.

'What can I do to make it better?’

'You can’t.’

My heart dropped. 'What do you mean?’

'It means that you can’t be here with us anymore.’

'So.. you’re just gonna throw me away.. just like that.’ I kept my tears in as hard as I can. My brothers were going to leave me for good.

'It’s for the best.’ Sam commented.

The pain was surreal. I thought that one thing that I’ll never lose we’re my brothers. I thought that no matter what happened to me, my brothers will be my backbone but now my whole life fell apart.

'I guess I’ll pack.’ I stood up and walked straight into my room without looking at either of them. I was embarrassed; I was a disgrace to the Winchester name.

As I packed all of my belongings, or at least things I needed during my journey, I looked around my room. Sam was right; it was for the best. If I was never here with them, they won’t be in much danger as they are right now.

I opened the window to my room; they wouldn’t care if I left without saying goodbye. I’m going to be thrown out anyway.

As I jumped out of my room, I landed safely to the ground. Without looking back, I walked away with the mindset that will forever kill me in the inside.

They don’t love me anymore


	2. Chapter 2

The first year was tough; growing up with two older brothers, I always counted on them. Ever since I’ve been alone I had to look out for myself.

Second year was lonely. I’ve never grew up living in a silent home; It was either Sam yelling at me to eat healthy or Dean not shutting up about his lame jokes.

Third year, I came into a realization that this was real. My brothers weren’t looking for me and they’ve forgotten about me. Deep down I always thought they were going to find me. That pain made me turn into someone that I didnt want to be; I had so much hate in my body.

Fourth year I made a change; I left Kansas. Wanting to be wanted by someone who didn’t search for me was dumb. They can’t control my life anymore; I ruled my own life and it was time I acted like it. It was time for a new life in Wyoming.

Now on my fifth year of being by myself I was hungry for a fight. I’ve never felt better, never felt so powerful until now. Every hunt I went made me feel as if it gave me strength. Every supernatural beings I killed made me feel like I had worth, like I had something to offer the world. It was a feeling I had never felt when I was with Dean and Sam.

While I sat in my motel room, I looked through the news to see if there were any hunts available for me. I sighed, there were no signs of unusual activities around the neighborhood.

As I closed my laptop, a sound came from outside. Quickly, I drew my knife from my boot, standing right next to my door. The door creaked open then I kicked the person right in the stomach which caused them to fall on the floor.

Unexpectedly, the second person came right in. As I grabbed their arm and twisted it, I pressed my knife towards their neck.

‘Y/N it’s us.’ A familiar voice spoke to me as he groaned in pain.

Gripping my knife harder, I twisted his arm even more. ‘What are you guys doing here?’

Dean slowly got up from the floor, patting dusts off his clothes. 'You’ve gotten stronger sis.’

'Answer my question.’ I shouted, not letting go of Sam.

'Woah, woah. You really wouldn’t hurt your brother would you?’ Dean’s eyes widened.

'Brother?’ I chuckled. 'Is that a joke? You guys kicked me out. I don’t have a family anymore.’

Sam winched, 'Y/N, we’re sorry. Can we please talk this out?’

I let go of Sam, then shoved him towards Dean. 'I don’t owe you guys anything. Just leave.’

'We’ve been looking for you since you’ve been gone. Until we talk, we’re not leaving this room.’ Dean addressed.

'We’re done here, leave.’

'Don’t you want to come back home?’ Sam spoke in a soft tone.

As the frustration led me to feel tears coming, I held it back in. 'This is my home.’

'Y/N. Please, I’m begging you. Come back.’ Dean unusually showed his vulnerable side.

'You guys are pathetic.’ I spat as I opened the door to leave the motel. If they weren’t leaving my room, I was going to get out myself.

Dean rushed by me, holding onto my arm. 'I’m not letting you out of my sight.’

Jerking my arm away from him, I gave him a dirty look.

'I did this to you…’ Dean’s eyes became glassy as a tear fell from his eye. 'I’m so sorry kiddo. All I wanted to do was to protect you.’

'You have a funny way of showing it.’

'I thought that if I let you leave the hunting life, you’ll be safe.’

'Well, you literally threw me into danger so thanks for that.’ I smart mouthed Dean.

Sam walked towards me and gave me a hug, I quickly pulled away. 'You can’t do that. No.’

'I’m sorry I wasn’t there to support you. I know that these past five years have been hard on you. We want you back, Y/N and be a family again.’

'That’s the thing, you guys don’t know how hard it was. Going back to you guys and be a “family again” is straight bullshit. Forgiving the both of you would be too easy.’

Dean sighed, 'I’ll do anything Y/N. Just come back home.’

'No. You can live the rest of your life without me because I’m never coming back. How’s that for knowing my pain?’

Sam took a step closer, 'No… please. Y/N I need you. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.’

'Goodbye.’ I said, having a glance at Sam and Dean who were silently crying. People say there are never goodbyes because people will see each other again. But this time, I meant it.


	3. Chapter 3

Playing with my knife as I sat on my bed, I can hear Sam and Dean arguing next door where they rented the motel room. It seemed foolish that they were arguing about me because I’m never going back to Kansas.

The shouting suddenly stopped as I heard a knock on my door. I didn’t care to answer it, since I knew it was going to be Sam or Dean.

‘Hey, we’re going to a diner. Want to come?’ It was Sam talking to me through the wall.

'Didn’t I tell you to leave?’ No matter how many times I told them that I wasn’t planning on going nowhere, they didn’t believe me.

'We needed a place to stay since it’s already late so uhm we decided to spend the night here.’

I rolled my eyes, 'And you happened to get a room right next to mine?’

'Uhm no we requested it. Look, we miss you okay? I hope you know that.’

Staring at the door, I sighed at myself. The more they tried to engage with me, the more hatred I felt for them. It was crazy what 5 years can do to people.

Sam noticed that I haven’t replied, 'I love you, Y/N. We’ll be back soon.’

Hearing his footsteps slowly fade away, I got off the bed. As I looked through the window, I saw the Impala driving away. It gave me a nostalgic feeling but it wasn’t a pleasant one. The feeling of pain flooded back and it hurt me. Then I decided to take a shower to try to flush all the pain away.

✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤ · ✤

As I was sitting on the chair gazing at my laptop, I heard Dean and Sam’s laughter from outside as they came back from their dinner. 'Y/N, I got your favorite burger for you. I’ll leave it here.’ Dean shouted before he went back into his motel room.

The anger flooded back; why did they never give up? It’s not like they cared for these past five years. Quickly, I got up from my chair and opened the door.

On the ground there was a paper bag. Slowly, I opened it and the smell was too familiar. Without realizing, I started to cry. The anger I felt over the years turned into sadness and I didn’t know how to switch it back off.

It was easier to turn against them than to wait for them to find me. Hating them was so much better than loving them. Forgetting the fact that my brothers practically threw me out the house was less painful.

But I could never forget

How can I? My only family that I had and known suddenly turned on me without a warning. I didn’t have a chance to change nor explain myself. The choice wasn’t there; they made it all on their own. They’ve abandoned their sister like I was a random girl living in the house.

I heard a creak from the door; I look up and my two brothers stood in front of me. It was too late to hide my tears. They’ve probably heard me sobbing over these burgers they bought me.

Dean kneeled next to me, 'I hate that I did this to you and wished that I didn’t even consider leaving you. I’m so sorry, Y/N.’

'I’m sorry I was stupid enough to listen to Dean. I knew that it was dumb but I went with it anyway. I wouldn’t be surprised if you do hate us.’

'All this time, I wanted to hate you guys. I forced myself to hate you two but I don’t. And that’s why I hate myself for that. You guys made me feel worthless, you know.’ I sniffled.

Sam placed his hand on my shoulder, 'As soon as you left to your room, I knew it was a mistake and… I went into your room and you were gone. The window was opened and… If someone should hate theirselves it should be us, not you.’

'We were dumb to drive our sister away. You’re the best thing that’s happened to me and Sam. I’m sorry for ever making you feel that way, sis.’ Hesitantly, Dean approached me, making sure that I might reject him; But I didn’t.

He wrapped his arms around me and held me tight. His warmth, his smell, his grip brought me back so many memories. I let out a loud cry as I hugged him back. This was surreal; I never thought I’d ever see my brothers again.

Sam joined in the hug, having enough length in his arms to wrap both of us. He then kissed me on top of my head. 'I love you so much, sis.’

Dean chuckled, 'Are you going to eat that burger by the way?’

'Of course I am, Dean.’ A giggle escaped my lips and I realized it was genuine happiness that I thought I’d never experience ever again.


End file.
